YOUR CHILD IS UNIQUE: – Never compare your child to his/ her siblings or friends. Each soul is unique. The beauty of this world is that we all are different. Let’s not try to change what is Impossible. For e.g. – If an extrovert child is social, can participate in debates, recitations- the introvert one can take up drawing, writing, painting etc.
2. NEVER HIT YOUR CHILD: – We as Parents are there to guide, to facilitate but we should never slap them. Some parents also punish their child by making them stand on one leg; ask them to stand outside the house for some time. It requires an unconditional empowering energy to bring about any positive change. We can get upset, convey our displeasure through some other way, withdraw for sometime to discipline them but hitting them at any cost is not done.
3. DON’T TAKE DECISIONS FOR THEM: – Let your child take all the decisions himself. The soul has all the maturity, just need to acquaint him with that. Don’t make him dependent on you. For e.g. Let him decide what he wishes to pursue, what he wants to gift his friends etc. You should involve your child in all major discussions of the house. It will automatically bond him to you- He will get that sense of respect from his parents. We can convey our opinions and suggestions to them at every turn nevertheless.
4. TEACH THEM BY EXAMPLE: – We eat unhealthy food, sip coke, sleep late, watch television- it is natural for the child to follow us. We eat fruits & sprouts, have milk, sleep on time, read books, talk politely- We’ll have to spend half the energy and time ensuring a healthy lifestyle for him. No wonder there’s a saying- Action speak louder than words. Also, If they are going wrong somewhere due to company of their friends or whatever the cause may be, never should we correct them in front of others. It’s very humiliating and embarrassing for the child to hear his shortcoming in front of his friends, your friends, whoever. Very important.
5. NEVER LIE: – You have an extremely important task/ meeting/ party and you can’t take your child. EXPLAIN THE TRUTH. There can be nothing more dangerous than the fact that the child loses his faith in his parents. You can build trust in your child from this tender age. It’s magical but they’ll cooperate beautifully if they know my parents are always true. 6. NEVER WORRY: – Concern is justified but worry and love can never go together. Love, positive feeling and worry, Negative emotion- Never goes hand in hand.
7. SPEND QUALITY TIME: – In a city like Mumbai, where most of the families are nuclear and parent’s working- need of the hour. Its Understandable. But ten minutes, during the day anytime preferably morning can we be what they want us to be, the rest of the time my child will be what I want him to be. All they need is some love and time – Make it Quality.
8. NEVER GET ANGRY: – We can be firm as we have the authority and so the responsibility to discipline them but Angry, we should not be. Anger is a negative emotion and remember just one letter away from Danger. Do you think we can raise our kids without being angry? It can take a bit longer to get your message across. We need to empower them by being resilient. We need to treat them like friends. Anger is one of our biggest vices. There is a difference in being assertive and aggressive.
9. INSTILL THE RIGHT BELIEFS:-From the time they are an infant and they fall while learning how to walk and hit a table, easy way out…….we hit the table and blame it for hurting our child. Somewhere we are instilling this belief that whenever you are hurt in life it is due to someone or something outside. Why we never make an effort to teach our child to look or learn how to bend to avoid any accident. If you don’t eat food or don’t do your work, I will not talk to you. They are born fearless….why instil fear in them. There is a candle lit and the child gets fascinated. Before he even does anything we start shouting Beware….but lets understand he doesn’t know and wants to explore, discover. Hold his hand gently; take it next to the fire and automatically when he will get the feel of heat he will withdraw. Its how much patience we have with them that counts.
10. THOUGHTS CREATE DESTINY:- Lastly, We teach our child to read well, speak well, behave well, listen well, write well so on and so forth but do we ever teach them how to think well? You shall be what you think. How to think Positive? How to love and share with others? Thoughts create feelings, when we say we are feeling low we need to check the quality of our thoughts. Let’s take out sometime everyday to teach them how to think well for themselves and others and have a heart full of pure feelings for one and all.